a weekend full of love


un weekend plin de iubire

Comanda pizza in 2010

Ceea ce urmeaza este atat de aproape de realitatea informatica incat nu stiu daca trebuie sa ne amuzam sau sa ne speriem.

Clientul – Alo, buna ziua, doresc sa comand doua pizze.

Telefonista – Multumim ca ati sunat la Pizza Hut. Puteti sa-mi dati numarul dvs. de identitate (NIDN – national ID number), domnule ?

Clientul – Numarul meu de identitate nationala. Da, un moment. 6102049998-45-54610.

Telefonista – Multumesc, dle X. Vad ca locuiti la 1742 Meadowland Drive si aveti tel. 494-2366. Telefonul dvs. de la serviciu la Lincoln Insurance este 745-2302 iar numarul de celular este 266-2566. Adresa de e-mail este xson123@home.net. Corect?

Clientul – Mmda.. Da’ de unde aveti toate informatiile mele?

Telefonista – Suntem legati, ca orice companie, de HSS.

Clientul – HSS, ce dracovenie mai este si asta?

Telefonista – Suntem legati electronic de Homeland Security System, domnule.

Clientul – (oftind) Asta e . vreau sa comand doua pizza, Specialul All-Meat.

Telefonista – Nu cred ca este o idee prea buna, domnule.

Clientul – Cum adica? Este vreo problema cu pizza cu carne?

Telefonista – Domnule, analizele dvs. medicale arata ca aveti tensiunea arteriala crescuta si un cholesterol destul de mare. Conform dosarului medicul si compania de asigurari nu va permite alegerea pizzei cu carne.

Clientul – Ceee ? Si atunci ce-mi recomanzi?

Telefonista – Ati putea incerca Pizza cu Soia care are procentul de grasimi foarte scazut. Ar trebui sa va placa.

Clientul – Ce te face sa crezi ca o sa-mi placa?

Telefonista – Ei bine, vad aici pe monitor ca saptamana trecuta ati fost la biblioteca si ati citit o carte de Retete Culinare cu Soia.

Clientul – Bine, bine. Da-mi atunci doua pizza marime pentru familie.

Telefonista – Da, marimea este potrivita pt. dvs., sotie si cei patru copii, iar ceea ce ramane puteti sa dati celor doi caini. Totalul dvs.este $49.99.

Clientul – (strigind in casa) Nevasta, adu-mi te rog credit cardul!

Telefonista – imi pare rau domnule dar trebuie sa platiti cash. Credit cardul dvs. este blocat pentru depasirea limitei.

Clientul – Dau o fuga la o masina ATM si voi scoate niste bani inainte sa ajunga pizza la mine la usa.

Telefonista – imi pare rau domnule dar nici asta nu va fi posibil. Vad aici ca nu aveti nici un ban in contul dvs.

Clientul – Da . bine, n-are nimic. Trimite pizzele si gasesc eu niste bani in casa pana ajunge. in cat timp imi vine pizza?

Telefonista – Suntem putin in intarziere, as zice cam 45 de minute. Daca va grabiti, puteti veni dvs pana aici sa ridicati personal comanda, dupa ce faceti rost de bani. Pe de alta parte este putin mai jenant sa carati pizza pe motocicleta.

Clientul – Da de unde stii ca merg cu motocicleta?

Telefonista – Pai scrie aici la informatii despre vehicol. Ati avut o masina care vi-a fost luata de compania de imprumut pentru ca nu ati platit la timp. Alaturi scrie ca Harley-ul dvs este cu plata la zi si in plus i-ati umplut aseara rezervorul cu benzina.

Clientul – #%#^^&$%^$@#!!!

Telefonista – V-as sfatui sa fiti atent cu vocabularul ca sa nu o patiti din nou. Vad ca ati fost arestat pentru ca ati injurat un politist apoi judecatorul, cu care v-ati certat, v-a dat 90 zile de puscarie. Vad ca de-abia v-ati intors in societate de cateva zile si asta este prima pizza pe care o comandati.

Clientul – . (fara cuvinte)

Telefonista – Mai doriti altceva, domnule?

Clientul – Da, am un cupon pentru o sticla de 2 litri de Cola, gratis.

Telefonista – imi pare rau dar trebuie sa cititi mai bine. Pe cupon scrie ca persoanele care sufera de diabet nu se califica pentru oferta noastra gratuita. Noua Constitutie nu ne permite. Multumim ca ati sunat la Pizza Hut.

Order Pizza in 2010

What follows is so close to the reality that computer does not know if we need funny or scare us.

Customer – Hello, hello, I want to order two pizzas.

Operator – thank you for calling Pizza Hut. Can you give me your ID number (NIDN – national ID number), sir?

Customer – my national identity number. Yes, one moment. 6102049998-45-54610.

Operator – Thanks, Mr. X. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and you tel. 494-2366. Your phone at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and cell number is 266-2566. E-mail address is xson123@home.net. Right?

Client – Mmda .. „But where have all my information?

Operator – We are bound, like any company, HSS.

Client – HSS, which dracovenie is that?

Operator – are linked electronically Homeland Security System, sir.

Client – (sigh) That’s it. I want to order two pizzas, All-Meat Special.

Operator – I think it’s a good idea, sir.

Customer – What do you mean? Is there a problem with meat pizza?

Operator: – Sir, you show that you care and a cholesterol high blood pressure high enough. According to medical records and the insurance company will not allow choice of pizza with meat.

Customer – What? And then what do you recommend?

Operator: – You could try Pizza Soybean-fat low. Should you like.

Customer – What makes you think I’ll like?

Operator: – Well, see here on the screen as you were last week at the library and read a book with Soy Recipes.

Customer – Well, well. Give me pizza when two family size.

Operator – Yes, size is suitable for. Your wife and four children, and what you can still give the two dogs. Total dvs.este $ 49.99.

Client – (shouting in the house) wife, get my credit card please!

Operator – I’m sorry sir but you must pay cash. Your credit card is blocked for exceeding the limit.

Customer – Give a run to the ATM and get some cash before fleeing pizza at my door.

Operator – I’m sorry sir, but even that will not be possible. I see here do not have any money in your account

Customer – Yes. Well, never mind. Send pizzas and find me some money to get home. how long I can pizza?

Operator – We’re a little late, I’d say about 45 minutes. If you hurry, you can come here to pick up your order personally, after you get the money. On the other hand is a little embarrassing to carry a pizza on a motorcycle.

Customer – Yes do you know that bike ride?

Operator: – Well it says here the information about the vehicle. You had a car that you were taken from the loan company because you failed to pay on time. Along with Harley says that your site is pay-day and i have also filled the gas tank last night.

Client – #%#^^&$%^$@#!!!

Operator – I would advise you to be careful with the vocabulary so he would not happened again. I see you’ve been arrested for being a cop and then cursed the judge, with whom you argued, giving you 90 days in jail. I see you’ve only just returned to society a few days and this is the first pizza you order.

Client -. (Speechless)

Operator – anything else, sir?

Client – Yes, I have a coupon for a 2-liter bottle of Coke for free.

Operator – I’m sorry but you need to read better. The coupon says that people with diabetes do not qualify for our free offer. The new Constitution does not allow us. Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.

Anunțuri

Despre Sysy

Fara Dumnezeu omul ramine un biet animal rational si vorbitor,care vine de nicaieri si merge spre nicaieri,, (Petre Tutea)
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